NEW YORK - Ludacris will make a cartoon cameo in the 400th episode of "The Simpsons" as a tube of toothpaste that raps, of all things.
GEE! Of all things, a rapping tube of toothpaste! He might have been anything! A wheelbarrow that raps, or a rapping porpoise or, if the writers were feeling particularly esoteric, the classic 1939 film "The Women," staring Norma Shearer, Joan Crawford, and Rosalind Russel that....you guessed it....raps! (Tagline: The Female Of The Species . . . when the men aren't watching!) I can actually envision this so-called "writer" chuckling to themselves as they pounded furiously away at the keyboard, creating possibly the weakest opening sentence a story has ever had. This is even worse than the story about Law & Order: SVU that began "Fred Savage is a rapist! Or at least he is playing one this Wednesday night on NBC!"
I don't understand anything about this story.
Thomas Pynchon has been on this show.
Why is this even news? I can only guess it's a human interest story because corporate America has finally caught on to how the public can't get enough of talking personal care items.
I am assuming that the writer's of the Simpsons anticipated my disgust and confusion and produced an image to perfectly accompany my blog.
Those "yahoos" then choose to let my internet browser know that Matt Dillon was asking 'What are the most effective yet simple ways people can save energy?' Surely there is no one more qualified than the star of such hits as "You, Me, & Dupree" "Deuces Wild" and "One Night at McCool's" to reveal to me the mysteries of climate change. Was Leonardo DiCaprio busy? Zing!
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